All Hail Nihilism

This is going to be a short post. Haruki Murakami is one of my favorite authors. And as I browse through one of his novels (A Wild Sheep’s chase, incidentally I have already read 8 of his novels), I feel the reason why I like his writing style so much, is because he focusses on the mundane, daily aspects of our life.

Not some glamorous world tour, not some fancy murder mysteries, not some adventurous secret agent like James Bond, or Ethan Hunt, or Jason Bourne. No fantasy fiction either (Though of course the book has a lot of magical realms or mystical things to it). Which means we wont find the Starks battling the Lannisters, or Neo finding his way out of the Matrix, or Frodo making his way to Mordor to destroy the One Ring.

No, rather most of his books depict a male protagonist, who is usually solitary and lonely facing certain unique situations (usually negative or sad). He usually cooks his own food, listens to some classic music, goes out for a brief walk in the park, occasionally goes shopping for clothes, feeds his pets, goes to the library and reads certain books, uses public transport to commute across the city, speaks with certain random strangers at times, and listens to the birds chirping while doing his morning walk. Or he might be busy cleaning his dishes, or taking his dog out for a walk.

Yes, these are the things which we usually do on a daily basis, but seldom pay heed to. We might catch up with a tv show, or go through the pages of a novel, or just lie down on the bed with a beer can and listen to some relaxing music. But more often than not, we crave for out of the world, materialistic things. We feel that the Euro trip vacation will make us happy. Or getting that new job, or a new girlfriend or boyfriend. Or purchasing the latest gadgets in the markets, or eating at the latest cafes or joints which have opened up, in order to be socially accepted and to upload pictures on social media.

Yes, our instagram and Facebook accounts matter more than having a long interesting conversation with someone. Checking into Cafes has become the Thing to do, as is checking into international airports.

While trying to seek the glorious, we have forgotten to pay heed to the little things in life, for those are ultimately which matter and which will result in bringing us happiness. For life otherwise has no meaning and no purpose. We are born, we do certain things, get into certain professions, create some relationships and then we die. In the rush to glory, maybe pausing for a bit, and taking a step back to reflect, might help.

Until later, from a nihilist. Adios.

Living the Mundane Life with Glory

Today was an interesting day. Not that kind of interesting. Majority of the time, I would lead what you would call a typical ‘dull’, bachelor life.

Go to office on weekdays, come back home, have dinner, go off to sleep. Wake up, repeat. And that’s about it. On weekends, I will mostly immerse myself into reading, playing video games and watching tv series, with an occasional outing with friends or eating out. Board gaming was a passion, but unfortunately, the sole proper board gaming café in Kolkata is going to shut down. I miss Mumbai in that respect.

But by reading Murakami, I am amazed at how he describes this so called mediocre, dull life in his books so well. Just a typical day, where the narrator, takes a shower, makes his toast and coffee, sits down at his table, usually alone and listens to some good music. Or he goes out for a walk at the local park, sometimes takes the train to a particular destination, watches people go about their daily schedule, such as the milkman delivering milk, the librarian maintaining her accounts, so on and so forth.

And you know what, that’s what life essentially is. It is not a glamorous show off of your latest Europe vacation, or posting those selfies in 5 star hotels on Instagram, or giving hash tags of Foodporn at expensive restaurants, or having the most expensive of scotch with your baes, or checking into every international airport on Facebook. We have become social media validation seekers, chasing a hollow, meaningless goal which only gives us temporary pleasure. And as Mark Manson mentions in his book ‘A subtle art of not giving a f*ck’, seeking pleasure will only make you more miserable in the long run. Rather, accept pain and suffering as part of your life, and seek to enjoy the process of doing things. That in itself will bring you happiness.

While the day-to-day activities might seem pretty mundane, 95% of your life comprises of it. We should learn to accept what we have, and not compare our lives with the so-called perfect social media life of others. You do not have to party at expensive pubs every weekend just to pretend that your life is more cool and happening at others. Pursuit your own specific interests, and learn to enjoy the process, no matter how strenuous or cumbersome it might appear to me .

Personally, I am trying my hands at cooking. Though I am not good at it, and I do end up making a huge mess in my entire kitchen, I have nevertheless managed to make few items, and I take pleasure out of it. Even if it drains me out physically. I have also started walking for at least 30 minutes daily, and it helps calm my mind and take my tension off from my hectic schedule at work.
I am reading a lot of good books as well, and it helps adding to my knowledge and experience. Here are the names of books which I am reading at the moment:

• Triggers, by Marshall Goldsmith – Corporate Self Help
• A Wild Sheep Chase, by Haruki Murakami- Fiction
• The Idiot, by Fyodor Dostoyesvsky- Classical Russian Literature
• The Subtle Art of Not Giving a F*ck, by Mark Manson- Non Fiction
• Catalyst, by Chandramouli Venkatesan (Recommended by my friend Divya)- Non Fiction- Management
• The Gene, by Siddhartha Mukherjee- Non-Fiction/Biology
• A Game of Thrones, by George R.R. Martin- Fantasy Fiction
• A Suitable Boy, by Vikram Seth- Fiction
• Faultines, by Raghuram Rajan- World Economy

And I have recently completed the following books:
• The Country of First Boys, by Amartya Sen (A collection of his essays)
• Lone Fox Dancing, Autobiography of Ruskin Bond
• Democrats and Dissenters, by Ramachandra Guha- Non-Fiction, History
• What Got you Here Wont get you There, by Marshall Goldsmith
• Making Breakthrough Innovation Happen by Porus Munshi

Yeah I know, that’s a lot of reading. And a lot of people ask me, how can I possibly read so many books at once, and that too on multiple genres, without getting confused or lost. Well, I really don’t have an answer, except for the fact that I have been reading since as long as I can remember, and it has become a habit. It is something which I am extremely passionate about, and I am sure I will carry on reading till the day I can. One of my next goals is to get a nice book shelf created.

Today, I went and visited Birla Planetarium in Kolkata. I remember I had come here as a kid. I saw a show in the dome, which resembles the one at Nehru Planetarium. The show was titled ‘Cosmic Collisions’ and was a refreshing experience to see the virtual night sky, all lit up.

Few more things which I would like to do, is to get involved into some social work, and also try my hands at theatre/drama. Lets see how it shapes up. Till next time.

Adieu 2017

Okay, as 2017 draws to a close, as usual, I take some time to retrospect and reflect on what were the things which went well, and what were the critical learnings.

I started the year jobless, and I remained without a job for the first two months. To mention that in brief, it was a period of uncertainty, tension, doubt and it was definitely not a very pleasant feeling.

However, thanks to support from friends and family, I finally managed to get a new job in March, which led me shifting to another city. So after a period of over 3.5 years, it was finally time to bid adieu to Mumbai. I have had lots of good experiences in the city, met new people, made quite a few friends, interacted with colleagues, discovered my interest in modern board gaming, which led me to participate in several board gaming sessions, learnt to enjoy the continual monsoons, experienced the humidity and complete absence of winter, explored the areas, long walks on marine drive, vada pav, paani puri, had exposure to both Corporate and Factory HR- Professionally, and frankly did a lot of amazing things with some amazing people.

Nevertheless, moving to Kolkata was a good experience as well. The obvious advantage was getting a proximity to home, which helped a lot. I had not expected to be back in my home state so soon, but it was welcoming all the same. I reconnected with some old friends in Kolkata, and made a few new ones. Even discovered a Board Gaming café here, which I happen to frequent on most weekends. Again took a new place on rent, in a pretty decent society, though a bit far away from central Kolkata, but having good facilities nevertheless.
The new job is also going decent (with its shares of ups and downs of course, as I believe no job can be perfect). The best part of it being that my colleagues (especially in my team, HR) are really friendly, supportive and helpful, and I absolutely enjoy working with them and spending time with them. There were lot of new things to be learnt, both professionally and personally. I even got to see Shaan perform live in one of our corporate events.

On the personal front, I made few bad decisions, especially the one to get into a relationship with someone whom I didn’t know that well. Let’s just say that it did not turn out well for either of us, and we decided to separate pretty soon. That was also a learning though. One should never rush into these things, without considering all factors.

I got to visit my home once every month, and it feels good re-connecting with family, enjoying good home cooked food, and just relaxing without any worries. Thankfully my parents are still doing well, and are in good spirits.

One thing which I realized had taken a back seat was ‘fitness’. After a lot of procrastination, I finally pushed myself to go to the local gym, go on walks, etc. Very recently, I repaired my cycle (which was lying dysfunctional for over a year), and I today, I actually cycled over 10 kms to office, from my home. It was an exhilarating experience, to say the least.

Another thing which I ensured, was that I travel to at least two new places this year. So I made trips to Rajasthan and Uttarakhand (I have never been to either of the states earlier). I also visited Ranchi for the first time and met a friend there. I attended weddings of a few close friends, even visited Mumbai two times in between.

Also met Girish in the beginning of the year, who had come over from USA for a few days. I was still in Mumbai back then. Subodh’s wedding in Baroda was also one of the highlights.

I am also really glad that my habit of reading books remains unchanged. I have read quite a few good books this year, but two of them which stand out are ‘Sapiens’ and ‘Homo Deus’ by the same author, Yuval Harari, an Israeli Historian, who has written about the history of mankind, and has also predicted how things can be like in future. I would recommend everyone to read these two books, to get some incredible insights on life and evolution.

I have also developed my body clock to sleep early and wake up early. Nowadays I try to wake up in between 6 and 6:30 am, and go to sleep at max by 10:30 pm. This has really helped me develop a healthier lifestyle, though I have a long way to go.

There were failures too of course, I wanted to revise and brush my concepts of Japanese, but could not really spare sufficient time to do so. Neither have I been able to practice much on my keyboard, and my telescope remains inside my house, not yet opened once in the past year.

Hopefully, I will work on the above and more going forward.
That’s it from my side. Thank you for reading. Wish you a happy near year in advance.

Happy Diwali 2017

Happy Diwali, everyone. Hopefully all of you are having a good time with family and friends, and enjoying the festive season in India.

For me, this year has been eventful so far. It actually seems like it whizzed past by. And less than two months left for 2017 to end.

I joined a new organization, new role, new colleagues, new city, new experiences. Lot of new things on the professional front. And lots of learning as well. Shifting from Mumbai to Kolkata made me feel a bit apprehensive at first, but I am glad that I have (Almost) settled in. Being a native of West Bengal obviously makes things easy for me.

On the personal front, perhaps it wasn’t that positive but at least it made me learn few new things as well. I got into a relationship which did not work out, but made me learn lot of things.

Made few new friends here, unfortunately not enough. Discovered a Board gaming cafe in Kolkata, which was surprising, and also became part of a small Gamers group, which is probably my only social activity in Kolkata so far. Need to expand my circle probably.

I also travelled quite a bit this year, and quite a few places for the first time. I finally managed to make a trip to Rajasthan, which I wanted to for some time, and later also to Uttarakhand, which is another great state, especially for people like me who love the mountains. Ranchi was another city which I went for the first time. Saw MSD’s house as well. Will probably write about my travel experiences in a different post.

Recently, some of you might have noticed the #metoo hash tags being shared widely on social media by many people, most of them being female. That was a trend started to share the fact that the respective person has also been a victim of sexual harassment.

For many men, (at least in the Indian context), it came across as a complete surprise that so many women were saying ‘Me too’. But the depressing reality is that Almost every woman has been a victim of sexual harassment at some point in their lives, and many have witnessed it several times.

This is sad and shameful to say the least, but what makes it even worse is the complete apathy to this situation by many men. While its certainly true that not all men indulge in sexual harassment, it is also true that most of them have not done anything to oppose or stop it, or try to support the respective victim, instead of blaming them for getting harassed in the first place.

So it is upto us, especially men, to try to make the living and working environment women friendly and opposing harassment in every form. That is the only way we can hope to achieve gender equality.

Till next time, keep enjoying.

P.S.- PS4 Gaming is still on. And so is extensive reading.

I am a Feminist, and why you should be one too

Okay, to be honest, this post is not about Describing or explaining Feminism, or about bashing pseudo feminists. Lot of people have already done both in the past. I am simply trying to put into words the reason for me being a feminist. Do note that I shall mainly be focussing on the Indian context only, as I have little or no experience of Feminism views outside the country.

In the past few years, Feminism as a principle has been bashed almost unequivocally throughout the country. By media, journalists, politicians, social activists, college students, working professionals, the common man, and so on. It has almost become a fad of sorts- If you are a feminist, you should be treated akin a criminal. How dare you even think of supporting women, who have just no other work than to surpass men and disparage their efforts in every possible way. How can you be so blinded by their hogwash? Can’t you see they are just trying to dominate, and make lives miserable for men? Girls are asking men to stand up for a reserved seat in a bus or a train. That is just beyond criminal. How can we think of reserving seats for them in the Parliament or in top Business schools such as IIMs? How can women claim to be equal to men and then ask for reservation? Isn’t it the height of hypocrisy? How can a girl log onto a dating app as Tinder and claim she does not want to ‘Hook up’. Isn’t that criminal?

I think you get the idea. Female bashing has become the new trend. Shortly after the New Year incident in Bangalore (Sexual Harassment of hundreds of women), a new Hash Tag was born- #NotAllMen. Of course the men had to stand up for this shocking incident. By proudly proclaiming that Not all men were rapists or molesters. That there are many good men like ‘them’ in the world as well. How dare the women say that all men are criminals (its unsure who and where said that though). More and more men were coming forward and bravely posting their comments on Social Media, as to remind everyone(especially women) that Not all men were bad, not all men were sexually harassing others. That is such a noble thing to do, isn’t it? [Note- Heavy Usage of Sarcasm, and if you could not get it, then bless you]

A few days ago, I read a comment on Quora [A Popular website on writing Questions and Answers or General topics] in which a girl had mentioned that she is Proud not to be a Feminist, as she believes Males should get equal rights as Women. Reading that statement actually sent me into a state of shock. Here is the Dictionary Meaning of Feminism, just to get it clear:-

-‘The theory of the political, economic, and social equality of the sexes’- Webster
-‘The advocacy of women's rights on the ground of the equality of the sexes’- Oxford
-‘Feminism is a range of political movements, ideologies, and social movements that share a common goal: to define, establish, and achieve political, economic, personal, and social rights for women.’- Wikipedia

If you go through any of the above meanings, it becomes apparent that nowhere Feminism endorses the denigration of rights for men. It is really unfortunate that many people, even now, feel that feminists try to belittle men and criticise them for anything and everything. Most of these people have not read about the history and the past, where women have struggled for even basic rights. They did not have the right to vote, the right to live an independent life, or even the freedom to marry someone of their own choice,or to have legal and social equality. I would recommend everyone to read about the three different waves of Feminism, and more on the History of the past few hundred years before jumping to any conclusion.

I first heard of the term when I was in school, maybe in Standard 9 or 10. One of my schoolmates told me that he considered himself to be a ‘Feminist.’ He tried to explain to me what it was, but at that time, I could not really comprehend what it was all about. But what I did notice is that lot of males shy away from using the term to describe themselves, even if they believe in equal rights for men and women. Some of them think the term ‘feminist’ is too effeminate. It will make them look unmanly if they start calling themselves a Feminist. Others think that one can only be a Feminist, if he or she attends Protests or Demonstrations holding Placards and Charts advocating women rights, shouting at the top of their voices. Hence it is highly probable that if you ask a person, especially a male, if he is a feminist, he will answer in the negative. Fortunately, over a period of time, I learnt that gender discrimination is wrong. Girls have just as much of a right to education and a decent living as boys do. It is high time that men learnt to keep their (gender) superiority complex in check.

Lot of men write that Women abuse lot of laws to their advantage. A notable example being the infamous Sec 498A in the Indian Penal Code, which has been misused by several women to imprison their husbands or his relatives, on the pretext of harassment, and to get hold of his property/money. Or maybe the law on Adultery (Sec 497), which is currently biased in favour of women. While it may be definitely true that women might have used the law to their advantage, but the fact is that Both men and women use the law to their advantage. It would be extremely unwise to focus on one aspect and ignore the other. If there are laws which (presumably) favour women, then there are many laws which favour men too. We still do not have a concrete stand on Marital Rape or even Domestic Abuse, which is prevalent throughout the country, and almost all the victims being women. The majority of victims of sexual harassment continue to be women, and there appears to be little improvement in this regard. We continue to bash the victim with an archaic mindset(blaming her clothing, her upbringing, her nature and everything else except for blaming the criminal). This is a typical drawback of a highly Patriarchal society such as India.

Hence the call of the day, is that we need more Feminists. We need them to come forward and promote the cause of Equality, while supporting social, judicial, economical and legal rights for women. And we definitely do NOT need more men reminding us that they have never harassed a girl and how proud they are of themselves for doing so(almost as if it is an achievement- ‘not to molest’). If you are a man, I would just ask you to put yourself in the shoes of a woman for just a few minutes. You might perhaps understand, that women are judged every single day. For their looks, for their behavior, for their basic actions. We live in a society where women have to be on their toes throughout, in fear of being attacked or harassed(physical, mental, emotional, anything).

Let us come forward and do our best to make our society a better place for women. There is lots to be done.

The Himachal Solo Trip

So here goes. My first solo trip. Destination- Himachal Pradesh. I shall not be elaborating much on the places, but only covering the basics.

There are multiple ways to reach Himachal of course. I took a flight to Chandigarh, from Mumbai, and then took a train till Kalka. From Kalka, I took the Toy Train to Shimla, which takes around five hours in all. It was a pleasant ride, on the hills. Of course, if you go by road, it will be faster, but I wanted to try the train ride, and it did not disappoint. There were several foreigner tourists in my coach, mostly middle aged or seniors. I had a nice conversation with an elderly couple, who were from London, and visiting India for the first time. They had taken a tour package for a duration of three weeks and would be covering the major parts of North India, such as Delhi, Agra, Jaipur, etc. Here is a shot taken from the toy train:

I reached Shimla by early evening, close to 5:30 pm. My hotel was near the station and I decided to walk down. After getting some rest, I went for a walk on the famous Mall Road. It was a bit chilly at night, and I had not brought any warm clothes with me. But by the time I reached Mall road, it was already late and most of the shops were closed. I still had a good leisurely walk and returned to the hotel.

The next day, I booked a cab and did a Shimla tour. I covered some common tourist spots, such as the Jakhoo temple(devoted to Lord Hanuman), which had lot of monkeys roaming around, and Kufri, which is famous for adventure sports and Horse Rides. I tried my hand at few of the mini sports, including a Reverse Bungee jump. Picture below.

After Kufri, I visited the Viceregal Lodge, which is a typical portray of British Architecture. The gardens outside are well maintained. They charge you an entry ticket of Rs. 20 for visiting the garden and outside area, and Rs. 40 for a guided tour inside. Unfortunately the guided tour would only be done after 2 pm, so I took the garden pass and roamed around the beautiful area. Co-incidentally I met the British couple from my train ride over here as well.

The final destination in Shimla for me, would be the Army Museum. Amazing place and very well maintained. There is a Golf Ground nearby as well. Very scenic and picturesque.

I reached my hotel by late afternoon, and ventured towards Mall Road again, this time a bit early.I bought a jacket, as I was actually freezing by now, and walked for some 2-3 kms, before returning to my hotel. This was the end of the Shimla tour, and I took a bus to Kullu the next morning.

The bus ride to Kullu took more than eight hours. The roads are bumpy, but the view is really good. You can see the mountains, and later the river Beas flowing by. It is actually a sight to behold.

I reached the hotel by late evening. I decided to visit Manikaran and Kasol the next day and then move towards Manali, which is around 40 kms from Kullu. Unfortunately I had a minor accident that night, as I slipped and fell into a drain, injuring my right leg. I went to a Pharmacy shop and got the leg bandaged. Nevertheless, that did not dampen my spirit, and I was looking ahead for the things to come.

So next day I took a taxi to Manikaran. Manikaran is famous for its hot water springs. It has a Gurudwara and a Ram Temple. It is a good place for sight seeing. On the way to Manikaran, you pass through Kasol, which is actually a small town located on the valley. It has got the rather infamous name of being a Doper’s Paradise. From there, I went straight to Manali. I ended my day with a visit to the Hidimba Temple, and finally called it a day at my hotel.

The next day was devoted to roaming around Manali. I covered Solang Valley, which is famous for adventure sports when it snows. However, at the time when I visited, only Para-gliding was one. With my bum leg, I could not have done it. So I just chose to take a Cable Car ride. It reminded me of my trip to Mt.Titlis in Switzerland. The view was pretty good, and I took some good pictures before coming back down. Rohtang pass is another area which you can visit from Manali, but the Hotel person told me it was 50 kms away and not really worth going at, unless it snows. So i decided to skip the same, and head over to a place called Naggar, where you had a Castle(where some shooting of Bollywood films such as Jab We Met has taken place) and an Russian Art Museum, which took some amount of climbing up. Finally, we took a visit to the Manali clubhouse (Nothing much to do here but check out on some scenary and buy some gifts) and to the Mall Road, which is similar (but not as comprehensive) to the one in Shimla. There was a shooting of some Indian tv serial going on(I did not recognise the cast). Finally, headed back to the hotel. I had a night bus to catch for Dharamshala.

Unfortunately, this was the worst part of my journey. I wrongly estimated my arrival time at Dharamshala to be 6:30 am, whereas I actually reached at 4 am. Throughout the bumpy ride, I stayed awake, and started feeling nauseated. Ultimately, I puked in the bus. It was a horrible ride to say the least, and here I was, dropped at 4 am at a deserted place somewhere in Dharamshala. Somehow I managed to locate a taxi, and asked him to drop me to my guesthouse, which was at Mcleodgunj. I did an early check in and just crashed.

I woke up at 10 am, and decided to walk down to the Buddhist Temple, which is also the residence of the Dalai Lama. There were lot of monks of all age groups walking down the streets. It was a serene and resplendent sight to behold. Obviously there were lot of tourists there too, including foreigners, some of whom were practicing meditation on the temple grounds. After roaming around for some time I decided to walk back to the guesthouse. I inquired about a place which had waterfalls, named Bhagsu. So I decided to walk down there. It was a total distance of around 4 to 5 kms from my guesthouse, but made pleasant by some of the scenery nearby. You need to climb the steps for around half an hour to reach the top and get a good view of the waterfall. However it is not recommended to step into the water, as it can get risky. There have been cases of people getting drowned or thrown down.

I called it a day after coming back to the hotel. The next day was reserved for the Triund trek, which will take the better part of the day. I started at around 9:30 am and it took me roughly three and a half hours to reach the peak. I must admit it was quite a pleasant trek, and almost anybody can attempt it. I spoke to few people on the way, and accompanied a couple to the top. There were lot of foreigners too, and all of them were wishing us Happy Diwali. All in all, I would definitely recommend this trek, even to amateurs or newbies. I was back on the base by around 4 pm. Post which I took a taxi to the HPCA Stadium in Dharamshala. It was a well maintained stadium and after clicking few pictures i returned to my guesthouse. I took a bus to Chandigarh the next day. Had a short detour to the newly built Japanese Garden before heading back to Mumbai.

So there it ended, my first solo trip in Himachal. I really had a good time, and would hopefully return there again someday. In case you have any comments or questions do feel free to reach out to me. Until then, adios.

My First Ever Solo Trip- Some Tips & Tricks

Himachal Solo Trip- October 16

So here goes. My first ever Solo trip. And what an adventure it has been. I will be writing about some of the places which I visited, in Himachal Pradesh, which is in the north part of India. Before I begin writing about my trip, however, I suppose I could share some information for those people who are also looking to go on Solo Trips. For the expert traveler, you can kindly skip the next few paragraphs.

First of all, even though you might be going alone, it is advisable to keep few people, maybe in your family or friends about your location, in case of any emergency. This is even more important if you are staying alone, in hotels or guest houses, and not at a place of a friend or acquaintance. These are some of the things I did, before embarking on my trip.

Packed Light, as I knew I would be doing a lot of walking. Honestly, carrying an insane amount of luggage with you makes no sense whatever. Pack light, travel light. Will save you lots of trouble.

Carry a medicine and/or first aid bag with you. This is essential, you do need to carry basic medicines with you. Plus, I was going on a mountainous region, so I also carried some anti-vomiting tablets. And I make it a habit to carry some basic gel, band-aids and stuff. At a time of need, the pharmacy shop may be far away from you. So be prepared.

Made an itinerary, based on my budget, for roughly a week’s duration. Did all the bookings online, and well in advance. This saves a lot of hassle later on. The two important things are travel and lodging. I even booked buses to travel within Himachal, through redbus.in (a pretty handy site). Some of the other websites used to search for accommodations are-
www.trivago.in
www.cleartrip.in
www.booking.com
www.stayzilla.com

And others. Based on my budget, and the hotel ratings, I booked the hotels in all of the locations where I would be staying. Most of the hotels will not charge anything during the booking. You can pay when you check out. Make sure you read the other traveler reviews of the hotel to avoid any last minute bad experiences. Of course, depending on your preference, you might want to stay at dormitories, couch-surf, or look at guest-houses. I, personally prefer hotels, even though they are expensive, as they are safer, and offer more comfort. It’ s of course a personal choice.

Keep some loose cash with you, preferably in alternate locations (bags, shirt pocket, etc) in case you need it during an emergency. Also, some of the places where I visited did not accept debit/credit cards. So it is essential to keep cash. Do remember that unlike in metro cities, ATM’s are not very frequent. You might have to travel a bit to reach a working ATM.

Make a list of the places which you want to visit. Remember not to over-stuff too much of activities in one day. You might not be able to cover everything. Just because you are on vacation, does not mean you need to stress out. Keep some free time in between. Also, it would pay to have a basic look at Google Maps and get an idea of the location where you are traveling. For example it might take 8 hours to travel from Manali to Dharamshala by road. We need to factor all of this in our vacation.

Keep a photocopy of your tickets and necessary documents ready. You might need it at any time.

Also do not forget, to carry at least one Government Id proof with you. This is mandatory for checking into any hotel.

Rest, use your common sense and bring whatever item you would prefer. Though remember, not to overstuff.

Always remember to be alert. You are responsible for your own safety and the safety of your belongings. On a solo trip, you are alone. Do not get too relaxed, and get your stuff stolen in the process. Do not venture off alone in any deserted area, especially at night, if you are unsure about the location. It is also advisable not to carry extremely valuable stuff with you.

At the end of it, have fun. That’s what you are on a vacation for, right. Go discover yourself, learn to know your strengths and weaknesses better, and grow as a person.

Before I start writing about my trip, I would like to thank my good friend, Divya Gonnabathula, for telling me about all the places I should cover in Himachal, and sharing some good information. For those who would like to read about her experiences, this is her blog link:-

http://divyasojourns.blogspot.in/

Stay tuned for the next post on the Himachal Adventure.

Life at 27

The following answer was written by me, originally in Quora. I thought I would share it here as well.

Here's the link to the original answer

Question- How is life at Age 27 in India?

I have read most of the answers in this thread, and I can relate to a lot of them. For me personally, life is a bit confusing. There are good parts and there are not so good parts. Lets try to put it into bullet points(too much of MBA stuff again):

* You realize the value and worth of true friends, especially when you have very few of them by your side

* There are times when you wish to meet up with someone, but you are left all on your own(not necessarily a bad thing)

* More often than not, your job tends to take a toll on you, you have arguments with your boss, with your colleagues, and that leaves a bitter taste even after you go back home. As you rise up the corporate ladder, you do tend to see the ugly side of things

* If you are staying away from your family, you realize that you can never take things for granted. You do learn to manage things independently, but you also realize the importance and value of a family.

* If you have roommates, again it can go both ways. If you connect, then there is nothing like going for group events, watching theatre plays/movies/house parties, etc. But if you start having arguments, things can take an ugly turn

* If you stay alone, you might start questioning a lot of things. About life, relationships, values, work, money, pleasure, spiritualism, etc

* If you are in a relationship, at least you have a support. You can share both your pleasures and your pain with your partner

* You realize the value of money. No matter how much someone might say money doesn’t matter, it does. You should learn to invest and to save. Wasting money on useless activities is a sin(According to me)

* Learn to manage your finances, and invest into health stuff, such as books, physical activities, etc(linked to the previous point)
* Often, you might tend to go into depression. Especially if you have a hectic job, with little time for yourself, or your family/friends. Make sure you do manage a work life balance, as far as possible

* Most corporate jobs suck. Period. No matter how high you go, there will be lot of aspects of your job that you will not like. There will be a lot of colleagues you will not be able to get along with. Learn to accept it. Its part of life.

* Occasionally, you might start questioning the purpose of life. The truth is that life has no meaning. Its entirely what you make out of it. There is no hidden truth. Simple. Learn not to complicate things(saying out of experience)

* Value your relationships and the people around you. Ultimately, it is them who will come to your need, when you are in a crisis.
* You will learn to handle multiple responsibilities, and in a better way.

* You will often encounter people with high egos. Try not to get into a fight with them. Understanding the human mindset is essential for a good living. Arguments and fights rarely help anyone.

* You will often be tempted to eat junk food, and indulge in binge drinking to ward off the stress. Try to avoid this as far as possible.
* Travel as much as you can. It opens the mind to new experiences and culture.

* Do not hesitate to try something new and step out of your comfort zone. It will reward you in the long run. Delaying instant gratification also helps.

* In the end, try not to take life too seriously. At the end of it, we are just a part of an average planet in an average solar system, with an average sized sun, in a remote corner of the Milky way galaxy, which itself is part of billions of galaxies in our vast Universe. Take things with a pinch of salt.

Ultimately, this post turned out to be more of an advice thing, than specifying how life is at 27. Still, am glad I wrote it.

I am still Alive

So what has been going on in my life lately? Nothing much, just the same old grind of corporate life. I have now realised why hardly anybody is happy doing his day to day job, but has to keep going, for many factors, financial, social or the like. Or maybe just because any other option does not suit him or her. It has become more of a daily chore than anything else.

Mumbai weather is getting hot and humid, and definitely not the kind where you look forward to going out or travel long distance. Heck, even going into the plant premises in this heat serves as a deterrent. There are quite a few things that i want to do, but the planning has been lacking. It’s almost as if the entire week, you just wait for the weekends to arrive, and once they do, all you want to do is sit back and relax, and in a flash, you are back to your hotseat(office) again. Am I playing hide and seek with time again?

They say having friends is extremely instrumental in your life. So why do I feel even more lonely than before. Where are the friends when you need them? Or maybe it was the introvert and unsocial nature of myself which led me to the state where i am currently. I do not know. Right now, I am just trying to put my thoughts onto paper (not literally), but i guess all i am doing is exposing the confused state of my affairs.

Why is saving money in Mumbai such a pain. You just go out a few times, and you already feel penniless. Not to add the astronomical rents, and other expenses. Sometimes i wonder how people manage to survive here at all. Nevertheless in spite of being one of the costliest cities in the world, with all its traffic and problems, I still feel that this city has a heart, and i have developed a soft corner for it. Something which never happened with either Kolkata or Delhi. Thats another discussion altogether.

Thankfully, one of my oldest habit of reading continues to this day. Finishing more books, and starting yet some more. I am definitely going to finish all of Murakami’s works. The guy is simply a genius. Anime continues as well. Definitely enjoying the Uchiha Itachi arc in Naruto Shippuden (I think the first time ever that i am enjoying watching a filler series). As far as video games go, not having much time for it, but still MGS 5 is going great. Just completed a long mission, and it thrilled me like it did for MGS 1, nearly a decade ago. There are quite a few games I am yet to catch up on.

I am quite sad to say that the fitness thing is going nowhere, and I have become more fat and overweight than before. It is time to say-Do or die. Reading Quora answers is a great source of motivation and occasional time pass. I have had a stint with some dating apps(including Tinder), which got me a few friends(yes, even if I didn't find anyone to Date), and after a long time in my life, I am spending some time with females. Getting to understand the female gender is a herculean task, but extremely enjoyable.

This year is going to be a year of marriages, as lot of my good friends and relatives are getting married. My best friend is going to get married this year as well. Of course I have always been a social recluse, and attending marriages isn't exactly my best idea of having fun. Nevertheless its good to step out of your comfort zone every once in a while. [Note to self- Stepping out in the afternoon heat from your AC room, doesn't really help much besides making you sick].

I am also listening to lot of old hindi songs, mostly the emotional ones. And their remixes. Particularly liked the Sanam Puri version of Mere Mehboob. Listened to it like 10 times in a row. I have been hit by severe depression often, including recent times. I need to develop a positive attitude towards life to deal with it. In spite of knowing the universal fact that there is no real purpose or meaning to your existence. You just survive, and then you die. Thats it. Considering yourself as some special entity or someone with a greater purpose is nothing more than fooling yourself into believing old myths.

2015 in review

Okay, yet another year gone by. I seem to have become an expert at all these year ending posts. Also, considering that I have hardly been writing anything in the past. Perhaps the zeal of writing is suspended for the time being. Nevertheless I feel like posting some of the Highs and Lows of this year as well. The hits and the misses. The lessons learnt and unlearnt. And with a vivid certainty, that no matter what happens, life continues to move on. Teaching us things on the way. In this way we all learn.

Some of my plus points for this year were:

1. The Europe Trip- My first ever international trip. And it was definitely worth it. A big thanks to my colleague Sovan, for coming along. Overall, it was definitely an enriching experience and an eye opener for me. I would definitely like to come back here soon in future.

2. Change in Work Profile- This was something I was desiring for a while, due to my lack of satisfaction in my previous role. And I am glad that I managed to get a transfer. I complete 2.5 years of work experience, and overall, I am not quite satisfied with the corporate life I have led so far.

3. Resumed the habit of Reading- I admit, in between I had given up my biggest passion- Reading. But I managed to get back to it, and purchased several books in different categories. I have also gone back to reading more of fiction. And I am glad to say that I am reading quite a lot these days. Books never betray.

4. Cycling- Finally, a checklist tick marked. I purchased a new bicycle, Firefox brand. And I do admit, it is definitely fun to cycle around, admiring the scenery around, and trying to be a bit close to nature. It keeps you fit as well. And am glad to say that even though being an amateur, I managed to consistently cycle 20+ kms in one trip. Even though am only getting time for this on weekends.

5. Japanese- I took the JLPT N5 exam, and unfortunately could not clear it. But am looking forward to taking it again. I need to give a bit more effort for this language, as Japan has always been my passion. Am looking forward to planning a Japan trip as well, in 2016.

6. Travelling to some new places such as Lucknow and Hyderabad this year, and looking forward to more next year.

7. Saw a lot of good movies, and played some decent video games, 2 of my major loves. Also saw some decent tv shows. While Avengers 2 might have disappointed a bit, Star Wars Episode 7 made up for it, and Bollywood too gave us some good shows in Badlapur, Talwar, Brothers, etc. Metal Gear Solid 5 was the biggest news in 2015, when it comes to gaming. True Detective season 2 did not live up to the mark, but Narcos was a pretty good discovery. Game of Thrones is going strong as usual. And I finally completed Breaking Bad(which I had started way back in July 2013). Also began with Suits, and am 4 seasons down. I also managed to see some good plays and Stand up comedies. A walk in the woods, starring Naseeruddin Shah and Rajat Kapoor was pretty good, and so was Anupam Kher’s ‘Mera Who matlab nahi tha.’ Saw some good performances of East India Comedy as well.

Some of the not so positive points are as follows:

1. Inconsistency with gymming/exercising:
I admit, I failed miserably when it came to go to the gym consistently, or sticking to a fitness regime. As a result, I have become grossly overweight, with a big protruding belly which everyone seems to enjoy making fun off, and gorging on junk. This HAS to change.

2. Failure with the Keyboard:
I tried to take some lessons, enrolled in Keyboard classes, but lost interest after a month, and it didn’t quite work out. The keyboard has been gathering dust ever since. The same goes for my telescope, incidentally. Though I have managed to see Jupiter and Saturn through it.

3. Yet to do some voluntary work, with an NGO or otherwise, as had planned earlier. Need to execute this in action soon.

4. Yet to learn a proper sport, such as tennis or squash. This has also been procrastinated due to one reason or another.

5. Again faced a heartbreak this year, and honestly am fed up of the same by now. Sometimes I wonder if it is even worth to fall in love with someone, knowing full well it wont get reciprocated. The feeling really sucks, to say the least.

6. Kind of lack planning when it comes to career goals. I admit I am extremely confused, and I overthink without any consequence or result.

7. Lack of social life, and inability to make new friends- I guess I have hardly made any new friends in the lasts few years, and at max, I just hang out with few of my colleagues, that too rarely. I guess my introvert nature, and apprehension at mixing up with strangers, has proved to be too costly. There are times when I feel extremely lonely, and yet have nobody to go to or speak to. That really makes me feel bad.

Anyways, with all the highs and the lows, I am hoping life is shaping out for the better. The future is uncertain, and as uncertain as it can be. I have no idea what is going to happen, good or bad. But what I have learnt is that we should appreciate all the small things in life, as ultimately, that’s what life is all about. There is no ultimate truth or discovery which we might believe we are pursuing. I guess we all have to learn to remain satisfied in that.

P.S.- I have heard about the new anime on Uchiha Itachi to be released in 2016. Really looking forward to that.

Euro Trip Part 1

So finally I purchased an Apple product with my Macbook Air. I have to admit, I am impressed with the look and feel of this laptop. Of course, my preference was having a light and thin laptop with decent portability.

Anyways on to my Euro trip. This was the first time that i had ever gone out of India, so it was an exciting trip all the same. I had of course, no idea that the immigration queue is so long, both at the Mumbai and Heathrow airport(London). I had to wait for over 1.5 hours in the queue in the London airport. Nevertheless everything was smooth, and I did not face any inconvenience in travel. Lufthansa was the airline, and everything went by without any hassles.

London is definitely a good city to move around. The first thing that i noticed, however, was that everyone practically rode a Superbike out here. And the car license plates had a different format for the numbers. As part of the tour, we visited the Lords stadium, Buckingham Palace, the Big Ben, and finally Madame Tussads. From there we were supposed to catch a Ferry to Holland.

What you need to know about Tour Agencies

Okay, I wanted to write two separate posts on my recent Euro trip experience. One would be about the places I saw over there, and my experiences, and the second would be about the Pros and Cons of choosing a Tour Operator (Since I went with one).

So in my first post, I shall be telling you about the advantages and disadvantages of booking a Group Tour through a Travel agency.
The popular travel agencies in India include SOTC-Kuoni, Thomas Cook, Cox & Kings, etc, which are all associated with the respective international brands. You can get customized packages, or you can go along with the Fixed itineraries which they provide. Usually booking in advance, can get you certain amounts of discount. The popular packages include Europe, US, China, etc.

The reasons for me opting for a tour operator were the convenience factor, especially considering the fact that I had never gone out of India before. The tour operator will do all the dirty work, ie the formalities involved for you to step out. This includes, processing of VISA, booking the flight tickets, the hotels, and the internal travel. All you have to do, is to provide your documents, passport, and do your luggage packing. They will take care of the rest(Once you pay of course). Hence, it is much more easy, especially if you are going out for the first time.

However, once you are aware of the entire process, you can definitely plan all of this on your own. It is not that difficult, and many of my friends do it. Do remember that booking in advance, can help you save lot of money. Nevertheless, that is not something I have done yet, hence am not the right person to advice for the same.

The above were the major Pros of going with a tour operator. You will also be assigned a Tour Manager, who will be there with you throughout the course of the journey. He will guide you with all the locations, and will also manage your time for the same. Ideally, he is supposed to have decent knowledge about the locations as well.

Nevertheless, in spite of all the above advantages, and convenience in booking the tour, there were lot of things which I did not like. However, I should mention that I had anticipated some of the same in advance, before I did the booking.

1. You may or may not like the other people in the group. But you will be stuck with them throughout. Obviously, Indians are known to cause huge amount of ruckus and chaos wherever they go, so if you put 50 strangers together, there is bound to be friction and differences arising, and you may not like that. However, there is still the possibility of you making a few new friends.

2. Check the package for the food options. Most Indian tour operators give you Indian food, and take you only to Indian restaurants, for Group tours. You may or may not like the option. In case you want to try the local cuisine, you will have to shell out extra money from your pocket, and you may not even have the time to go to a local restaurant.

3. Your entire time and duration, ie itinerary is fixed. You cannot just go wherever you like, or stay at a particular duration for how long you like. You have to move depending on what the Tour Manager tells you. And you will have to move with the rest of the group, whether you like it or not. This definitely turns out to be a dampener, as there are many locations which are just touch and go. So you can hardly say that you even saw the place properly.

4. In our package, the entire travel was done by Coach (bus), and needless to say we travelled long distances, which becomes tiring and uncomfortable. There were days, where we were travelling 9 to 10 hours continuously in the bus. The journey can be made much more easier, by travelling in train(Europe has some of the best train services), however most Tour Operators will only look at reducing their cost, and will opt for buses. Personally, I hate long bus journeys, and this was certainly the most irritating part of the trip for me.

5. Most of the hotels which are booked are budget hotels(of course depending on your package), located at the outskirts of the city. The rooms will be small and uncomfortable. Of course, it might be staying just one night, but if the day has been tiring, you would prefer to sleep properly at night. In one hotel, the air conditioner was not working, and they refused to even acknowledge it.

6. You miss out on the opportunity to interact with the local people or with travellers from different countries. This is something which you can only do if you are travelling on your own. You just wont get enough time to do this in a Group Tour.

So overall, though the places visited were good, but the cons outweighed the pros. Next time, I definitely will not be travelling with any tour operator. The best thing is to make a small group of 3-4 people and plan on your own. Fix your budget, decide which locations you want to go to, and make your plans. Its good to spend at least 2-3 days in one Country, in order to take your time and explore. Otherwise you will be in a rush just travelling from one destination to another.

This is me, signing off, soon to be back with my experiences in another post.

A Little Pinch of Salt..

Okay, I know I haven’t blogged for a really long time now, and my blogging is reduced to a mere post a month. Maybe I just don’t like blogging nowadays. Cant think of a better reason. I know compared to the views and hits I used to get earlier, just a handful of people actually bother to read my blog posts as of now.

And maybe I don’t really have any concrete stuff to write either. Office life is going on as usual, with its shares of ups and downs. Still have to learn a few things, especially the art of prioritizing and managing time.

The good part is that, I am learning to keep myself involved. I have finally(partly thanks to Subodh for this) joined a gym, and will hopefully maintain the consistency to become fit. I have also joined Japanese classes, and my passion to learn Japanese will hopefully now help me learn this beautiful yet complex language.

Next stop is to start a particular sport. I hope this planned change in my life will bring in further benefits. Both professionally and personally. But I can finally say that I am indeed living life. Depression and frustration stay away.

Reading continues as usual. Occasional video gaming and tv watching too[which is time waste]. Sometimes, try my hand at cooking some basic stuff. Made anda bhurji for the first time, and liked it. I think now I do need to socialize a bit more. Maybe I will do the one thing i really hate, and go to some club, just once. Havent been to one for a long time.

Personal Stuff..Again!

To be honest, I admit I have been writing much less than I used to. Perhaps because I am now immersed in full time work, honeymoon period being over. Or because somehow I don’t really get the inspiration to write nowadays. The once a dream of becoming a writer has also slowly faded away with time, bringing way to new priorities and opportunities. That being said, I do want to publish at least one book in my lifetime. You never know what surprises life brings next.

I think I did some introspection and analysed a few of my weaknesses. Things which I need to improve. Somehow I feel that I can be more social, and take part in different activities outside of work. I have to prioritize and set things right. Sitting at home and doing nothing, will end up in disaster.

Right now, after being in Mumbai for over a year, I still have not made any major contacts outside of my company, and beyond my MBA batchmates. This definitely leaves scope for lot of improvement. Moreover, I have to look at my health, and fitness, which definitely needs lot of push ups(pun intended).

Somehow I have always wanted to travel to different places, but lacked the guts to do so. Now I am making it a point to visit at least two new places(namely cities) each year. Done with Bangalore for this year, looking at Hyderabad next.

Learning to manage finances and savings/investments is the next major challenge. This step, however is going to help me for the rest of my life, so is without a doubt, extremely important. And again, I want to pursue my interest in Astronomy too. So many things to do, so little time. Life is about priorities.

Quite a few people comment that I have become ‘settled’ in Mumbai now, with a decent job, all facilities, and the only thing left to do is to get a life. Short minded thinking notwithstanding, why do people believe marriage is like an ultimate goal in life? Now, with that being said, I do admit that I kind of regret the fact that I have never been in a relationship. Positive or negative, there are things you learn which you cannot if you have been single all your life.

There may not be any ultimate purpose of living, but if you are living, you better make every second count.

Recently completed the Truth about the Harry Quebert Affair. An interesting fiction book, which I would recommend. In gaming, I am occupied with Tomb Raide (2013), which is definitely a pretty good game. Looking forward to MGS V.

Thinking about picking up a Real sport now for a change.

Too many plans, and none executed. I think for a change, I need to focus less on planning, and more on doing the Execution part. This has been another weakness. Too many ideas and plans killed in the initial stage itself, mostly due to laziness than anything else.

See you all later. Till then, enjoy your lives to the fullest.

My First Designation

I write this post after completing 13 months in BASF, my first job. It has really been a roller coaster ride so far, and I hope I am a better person than I was an year ago. Both professionally and personally.

Tonight, I returned home at 9:30 pm, due to some last minute extra work. But I am still feeling happy. Amidst the heavy pouring rain, life goes on as normal in Mumbai. I got two more books today, and as ever my list is increasing like never before. Though of course, I moved into a new place, so still taking time settling down. The experience in the Dahej plant was pretty good, but as of now, am really glad to be back in Mumbai, the city of dreams.

We had a mini celebration in office as well, and of course got the confirmation certificate post completion of my yearlong training. Now I am officially an Assistant Manager in Human Resources, at age 25(one of the youngest in the company), and definitely looking forward to my new role. Working in a team, and dealing with policies which impact the welfare of all employees, is something which really gives you a kick from inside. Recently a senior colleague who met me, told me that I should be in Marketing, considering I am from FMS (known as one of the best bschools to pursue a career in marketing). However, I am quite sure that HR is my calling. Even in my batch, people remember me as ‘THE’ HR guy. But, its only now that I feel I am making a very tiny dent in the big ocean which is HR. But definitely a good start. And I am thankful to BASF, and my remarkable colleagues for giving me this opportunity.

I just saw the latest episode of Naruto, and even though the story may be too stretched or illogical, it still inspires me to do my best. Especially considering the spirit of Itachi Uchiha is still remembered and elaborated. He will definitely be the most inspiring fictional character for me till the end.
But I seriously do need to take a vacation to a proper place. Plans still pending.

But I am happy that I face very few periods of depression/frustration nowadays.

What makes me Happy?

What can make you happy? Well, you will have to answer that yourself. But happiness is a state of the mind. Only you decide when you want to be happy.
Here are some of the things which make me happy: (the list is by no means Exhaustive):

1) Reading a good book
2) Having Choco Frappe at CCD, along with a friend
3) Whatsapping someone I like
4) Playing a good Video Game on my PS3
5) Watching a thriller or suspense movie
6) Reading good articles on a Blog
7) Seeing Superheroes battle to save the world from evil
8) Going out for an Evening walk (alone)
9) Talking to people I care about
10) Solving a tricky puzzle
11) Doing a good task in Office
12) Interacting with people
13) Eating my favourite dishes (usually Dosa or Idli)
14) Exercising
15) Visiting a Good book store
16) Observing other people
17) A visit to a Hill station
18) Writing Blog Posts
19) Playing a Game
20) Having a cool and refreshing drink in summer
21) Sleeping with a blanket in the chilly winter
22) Watching anime
23) Reading Manga
24) Sleeping
25) Motivating others

So you don’t need to be a genius in order to be happy. Live every moment to the fullest. This is your life, make the best out of it.

More Updates

2014 is up and running, and I am glad that I have begun doing two good things.

One is keeping a daily expense tracker in a diary, mentioning where the bucks are flying. Yeah of course, we can do it on a smartphone or on excel, but I prefer the old fashioned way.

Second is to devote 15-20 minutes(minimum) daily on free hand exercising. And yes, am planning on joining a gym later this year.
Currently watching Attack on Titan. It’s a pretty decent anime, according to me. And yes, wishing that Naruto ends fast.

Reading the biography of Narendra Modi. The book seems interesting so far.

Work is going on good and hectic. Nevertheless its fun to have friends at workplace, which makes it enjoyable at the same time.
No new crushes so far. Not that I am expecting to make a girlfriend minus any effort.

A telescope purchase is pending.

And I am finding it increasingly difficult to just sit down and write on serious topics. I will make an effort in future however.
Oh, and yes, I have (almost) given up on junk food. At least chips, chocolates, ice creams and cold drinks are definitely off the radar. And I was never a pizza/burger fan anyways. Will have to reduce the oily stuff too.

But so far so good. Now, I would really like to get rid of my laziness by stepping out of home more. And explore new stuff. Hoping to take a vacation this year, at a decent place.

One area which we cannot afford to ignore is AAP. And yes, Mr. Kejriwal happens to be the cynosure of all eyes. But somehow I feel a bit sceptical. Lets wait and watch. By the way, he had visited FMS last year(to take a session). So have seen him in person.

Rest later.

P.S.- GTA 5 is an amazing game. Period.

P.P.S.- Have been playing Naruto Ultimate Ninja Storm 3 online for some time now. And I must say, there are some outstanding players across the globe.

Of Dating, Booze and More!

The first post of the new year. So let me handle two topics which lot of people ask me: i) Boozing, and ii) Dating/Relationships

i) Why am I a teetotaller? That too, being a Sardar.

First of all, there are quite a few other Sardars/Sikhs who do not drink as well. Generalization and stereotyping does not help. Many people ask me why I do not drink. Or party. One guy even asked me this: ‘You do not smoke. You do not drink. How do you enjoy life then?’

To all of them, and anyone who is interested to know: I do not have a logical answer to this. I don’t drink simply because I don’t want to. Disappointed with the answer? Live with it. But, yes there may be a psychological reason, with me considering myself superior or a ‘good’ guy just cause I do not booze. And yes, I do feel uncomfortable when people drink around me. Can’t help it. And watching people knock themselves out/puking, fully drunk, actually makes me feel disgusted to the core.

And I do not party, because I don’t like crowds. Plus I do not drink or dance. No point just standing and staring at the people, is there?

ii) Why do I not have a girlfriend? Why don’t I date anyone?


Again, I do not know. I do NOT have any principle of not dating a girl. I am totally fine with dating or having relationships. It’s just that it hasn’t happened so far. End of story. Yes, maybe I didn’t put in any effort to woo a girl. Maybe girls don’t like to be around me. And of course, going to a bar or pub and trying to buy a girl a drink doesn’t count, when you don’t visit bars. Being from a ‘Boys Only’ school, an Engineer and an MBA from a top bschool does not help when it comes to making female friends, or girlfriends. And being someone who doesn’t like to socialize much will also provide limited opportunities for hanging out with the fairer sex.

Do I care? Maybe, maybe not. It all depends on luck. Konnichiwa 2014.

2013 in Flashback

This may be my last post for the year. So how was 2013 in review, in retrospect? Was it better than 2012 or worse? Oh, well, like most other management grads, let me also put some bullet points:

Yin:
• Finally began my first job, at BASF. Been a good journey so far
• Made new friends, though all within BASF
• Met some old friends, had some good times
• Shifted to Mumbai for the time being, liking it better than Delhi
• Got a PS3, and some cool games to go along with it(including GTA-V)
• Mastered Naruto Ultimate Ninja Storm 3
• Got some decent books as well
• Saw the first play of my life (The Vagina Monologues)
• Visited the Times Literary Carnival 2013 (with Amitabha and Girish), a great experience
• Completed my MBA (Don’t feel like mentioning that, but its kinda important nevertheless)-and passed all subjects
• Got my heart broken(by one of my past crushes)
• Started Breaking Bad
• Finished a few anime- Samurai Champloo, When they Cry Season 1, Mirrai Nikki, etc
• Tried out a few new restaurants, notably Delhi Durbar
• Had my first Starbucks Coffee (with Girish)
• Had a rural stint, in work
• Managed to get back in touch with a good friend
• Visited an Oktoberfest(German beer festival) and had just plain water
• Visited Elephanta Caves once more(had been there in 2012)
• Saw Gravity at Imax Wadala
• Went for shopping with female colleagues (re-learned the art of patience)
• Went for an Outbound training session at Kolad
• Saw how board meetings are like
• Stayed alone at hotels in rural areas
• Danced and performed in front of a crowd
• Travelled to Pune, and Met Amitabha

Yang:
• Gained Weight
• Had occasional bouts of depression
• Did few things which I should not have, and ended up hurting others in the process
• Felt the loss of my grandfather, who passed away this year
• Felt aimless and goalless at times
• Procrastinated
• Wasted 2 months at home, doing virtually nothing but facebook and whatsapp whole day
• Had tons of health problems, felt miserable
• Felt pessimistic

So in all, I guess 2013 was probably a better year than 2012 was. I wont say that I am at the best of my moods right now, but am definitely better off than I was in Delhi.

Lets see what 2014 has in store for me.

Special thanks to everyone who made this year special for me.

And a special mention to the Grow Batch(Trainees in BASF) 2013: Nikhil, Jerry, Swati, Anupama, Shapnaa, Prakash, Waseem, Ravi and Subodh. It was real fun hanging out with you guys.

Crushed

The following may or may not be a work of fiction. Reader discretion is advised.

My first crush was a girl in my class, during my 11th standard. I had just changed my school from a boys-only to co-ed. There were a mere 10 girls out of a class of around 60 students. No wonder the skewed sex ratio acts as a deterrent for female education. I felt as if I was in love. I guess it was nothing more than initial attraction.

My way of trying to please her, was to solve some computer programmes and give her print-outs of the same. Yeah, pretty lame when you look back at it. Initially it was going fine, but then I stupidly took a picture of her during a tuition class. It was the era of the early camera mobile phones. Of course the news spread that I was ‘Line-marooing’ the girl, and she stopped talking to me hence. Post which I discovered a new emotion-Jealousy. Particularly when she spoke to other guys, and ignored me. It felt like hell at that time. Little did I know that this problem would strike at me again and again and again, to this day.

Entire class 12 was worse than hell. Not to add to the fact that I screwed up all my competitive exams. Enough said.
There was another girl I liked at school, though she was not in my section. We shared a common tuition too, and I become online friends with her. Even spoke to her on the phone, but never face to face. I still remember she had written a testimonial for me on Orkut (Yes, those were the days). I am still in touch with her, and she knows that I had a crush (albeit minor one) on her.

Coming back to Orkut, that was where I met my first online crush(Yes, I have had a few online crushes too), sometime around 2006-2007. She was an anime fan like I am. I was really charmed by her(even though I never met her). She was from a wealthy family, and she was also a gamer(I have known very few female gamers in my life). Plus she had roamed across all the major countries. Right now she is working with some Airlines company in the middle east. And she has a boyfriend. The last I interacted with her, was in 2012, via email. No word from her since.

My second major crush was during my first year of engineering. I was just beginning to settle into the realms of mediocrity, when I met this Bong girl from Kolkata. Apparently, she had interest in books and arts as well(I remember her saying that History was her favourite subject in school). And she was pretty decent in English(One thing which was seriously lacking in our college). So we kind of got well along together. She was also the first girl who used to respond to every single SMS of mine. That was the time when I got hooked on to smsing. I wasted a hell lot of time on it. There was another girl who I was close to(though she wasn’t my crush).Things were good for the first 8 months or so, after which I screwed up real bad and that was the end of our friendship. She too started ignoring me. Soon after, the other girl followed suit. That was a very tough phase for me. But I also realized that it was my fault in the first place. I made lot of wrong decisions, for which I am regretful. But then, you cant change the past. Whats done is done. You simply need to move on. And yeah, its much easier said than done. I learned that the hard way.

Then there was a girl in my college, who I thought I liked initially, but after hearing she was committed, I backed off. I never really liked her attitude, to be frank. But that was only for a short while. Then there were a few more online crushes which I would rather not talk about. Is it even possible to fall for a person without even meeting him or her?

Okay, the rest of my engineering life passed by pretty much crushless(apart from another failed situation in which I actually purchased a teddy bear for a girl, and later got to know she has a boyfriend). Even my interaction with the fairer sex dropped drastically. It was almost like back to the school days.
Fast forward to MBA. There was a girl who I had interacted with on facebook on gtalk after converting FMS. I started developing (online?) feelings for her. I wasn’t sure if she was committed or not(at least it wasn’t reflected on her facebook profile) and she was the one who had initiated conversation with me.
I met her soon enough, when I started my MBA. The initial period was a pretty busy one, and I was kind of disappointed that we were never together in any group task. I didn’t get much chance to speak to her either. And considering the fact that I am an introvert, it made my task all the more difficult. But was I even looking for a relationship? Or was it just time pass? Many a time I have felt that I was very serious about the commitment. Later on, I felt it was a mere infatuation in a passing by phase of life.

One day, I remember I got a chance to sit next to her. She opened her laptop, logged into facebook, and showed me a picture of her sitting with a guy in some café. Which was her boyfriend. Excellent. Are all the good girls already booked? Nevertheless, my crush lasted for a while. She was a fresher, around my age, and she had lot of enthusiasm and energy. Plus she was intelligent and eager to learn. An ideal MBA student I suppose. However, with time, the crush fizzled out, and I moved on. Later on, I even told her that I liked her. She took it in a very sporty way, I must add. Some other girl may have been seriously pissed off. Although of course there have been instances when she became angry with me, even towards the end of MBA(but that’s beyond the scope of this post). As of now, we are seldom in touch(I last spoke to her in April, 2013).

My second crush in MBA. For some reason, I would not like to talk about it here. But I am still in touch with her. And she does not know that I ever had a crush on her.

Onwards to my third crush. She was from another bschool, a co-intern in my office during my internship in Mumbai. She was a very sweet and good looking girl. Later on I came to know that she had done modelling in the past as well. I have never seen her being angry even once, in the course of two months. I remember having given her quite a few movies from my collection. Plus we performed together as the lead actors in a flash mob. She had this sweet, charming smile, and she would smile even if she was not in a good mood. We discussed lot of things together. Towards the end of our internship, both of us went for a lunch at a nearby café. That was one of the best lunches of my life. I met her once more, later, during my PPI. She has left the country to work, and I am not sure if I will ever meet her again. But am in touch with her over whatsapp. And she knows that I had a crush on her, and is pretty cool about it.

Now for my fourth and final crush of MBA(and life, so far). She is a punjabi and a proper Delhite. She is the only girl, I actually thought I could propose for marriage. Though of course I dropped the idea later on. I was very serious about this girl. We actually spent a lot of time together as well. And we spoke on the phone quite a bit too. I was hoping she would develop some feelings for me too. But that was not to be. She was more close with another guy, and would spend most of her time with him. I guess she loves him. I am not sure. I even bought a bracelet for her, and gave her few of my drawings for her birthday. We had a few arguments too. She was a very open minded girl, and one of the few I knew who would use slangs freely, even in front of boys. But she was also a teetotaller. I have spent the maximum amount of time chatting and on whatsapp with her. In fact sometimes she would be peeved about the fact that I would chat more and actually talk less.

I told her that I loved her, but I guess she never took it seriously and laughed it out. We spent lot of time together in CCD and Dominos. I considered her as a very close and sincere friend. But somehow I got the feeling that she was more interested in getting my assignments and my books/other academic stuff than in me. Maybe it was me, who was just acting stupid and naïve the whole time. I was in touch with her till a few days ago, when she actually told me to f**k off. Point taken.

I have never been in a relationship, but have experienced lot of crushes. For good or bad, they have certainly made me more mature over the years.