Short Trip to Mumbai

Finally visited Mumbai after a gap of over a month. I have fallen in love with that city. To be honest, it is a bit of a difficult experience staying all alone, cut off from your friends and family. Yes, you do get used to it after a while, but somehow that feeling of being alone, sticks. Add to that the near absence of any hang out spots, or even proper restaurants nearby, and you get an ideal recipe for depression.

Nevertheless, this has been an experience of its own, and for the next few months will continue to be so. So it was a welcome relief to be back in Mumbai for the weekend. And luckily managed to meet quite a few friends, including Girish and Amitabha.

Yes, I finally managed to bring some of my books here. I was dying without them. And somehow, am trying to put a structure to things, and make the best of my time here. Both professionally and personally. So lot of things to do.

Though right now, I feel the charm of PS3 is fading away. I hope Metal Gear Solid 5 changes that. But the best part of being in Mumbai was to just enjoy the crowd and the food. Yes, you heard it right. I so missed the food. It is so hard getting south indian food here. Or good quality chaat. So I ate my way to glory.
Managed to catch a bad cold as well. And colds in summer are actually quite unpleasant. Oh well, I had enough of complaining. So could use this post in thanking those people who matter.

Of course, Amitabha and Girish needn’t be thanked. For we will keep bumping into each other without reason. But I would like to thank my Grow batchmates and BASF colleagues cum friends Anupama, Subodh and Shapnaa for sparing time. It is always fun hanging out with you guys. Anupama, I know you are gonna do a great job in your stint. Subodh, thanks a ton for the bike ride, in the peak summer heat. But Veg hut remains. Shapnaa, I know you love to talk, and you are pretty good at that and everything else. Keep rocking. Waseem was missed, but there is always a next time. And Swati, you better think of something fast. Everyone’s missing you as well.

Managed to catch up with Queen. A pretty good movie, but highly overhyped. Anyways, catch you all later. Adios.

Random..Again

Things I randomly think about:

1) The size of the known universe
2) Antimatter and dark matter/Negative energy
3) Extra-terrestrial life
4) Love. Duh!
5) What booze tastes like
6) Why do people dope
7) How does it feel to actually achieve Self Actualization
8) Will life’s rat race ever end?
9) Is money really that important?
10) Is having a partner that important?
11) The concept of phosphine(google it)
12) Is whatsapp and facebook an addiction?
13) Why is virginity over-rated?
14) Can Bollywood actually produce decent movies?
15) Higher end philosophical stuff
16) People who no longer matter
17) Meaning and Purpose of life
18) Futility of writing this post

Forgotten the Pursuit of Happiness?

Happiness comes to those who ask for it. Or those who deserve it. Is that really true? What does it take for a person to be really happy? Is it having friends and family around you? As a collectivist society such as India would believe. Or is it the determination and ambition to pursue your goals and dreams, and the feeling you get during the process is a combination of happiness and other emotions.

Does money lead to happiness? There is still sufficient doubt for this statement, but obviously those who do not even have sufficient money to eat three meals a day would probably be more unhappy than happy. Nevertheless there are lot of rich and unhappy guys out there too. Man’s demands are endless. We will continue to desire, and the vast majority of us will be stuck somewhere in the 2nd or 3rd layer of Maslow’s Pyramid.

But assuming that we are earning decently for a living, and yet we would like to do something which would make us happy. What should that something be? Obviously it would be different for each individual. A guitarist can be happy just playing on his guitar for hours. A tennis player will be happy if he manages to outlast a tough opponent. A Sales guy would be happy if he or she manages to reach the targets within time. A mother can be happy just feeding her child. A beggar might feel happy counting the stars in the night sky.

So where does motivation come in? And how difficult is it to stay self motivated all the time? Pretty difficult, especially if you are caught in a work environment you do not like. And this is true not just of corporate professionals but any human being. You can be a peon, but you can be the best in what you do. That is what most of us aspire to become. Better individuals, better earners and better contributors to the society, and hence, ourselves.

But why is it that most of us complain at some time or the other, of being frustrated, bored, depressed, sad, lonely, clueless, stuck in time, stagnated, angry, and a million other negative emotions. The biggest negative emotions arrive, when we feel the feeling of despair and helplessness. As Daniel Goleman explains in his book, Emotional Intelligence, it’s the frustration which builds up and causes worry, when a person is unable to resolve his problem or decide a particular course of action, which inevitably leads to a feeling of helplessness. This cycle continues, and in the long term can also result in bodily harm, plus in extreme cases, a mental breakdown.

Ideally, in order to be happy and possess a high EQ, we should learn to empathize with others. Which is much more easier said than done. Most of us are so caught up in our day to day activities, that just spending a few minutes doing something extra seems like a waste of time. The easiest thing to do in the world is blame someone else for the troubles you are in. The hardest thing to do, is to supress your ego and put yourself in that person’s shoes to understand the other point of view.

The first step in conquering negative emotions is ‘Awareness’. People with a better EQ, usually are able to identify when they are experiencing negative emotions. As a result, they are better equipped to identify the problem, and hence prevent a negative situation from escalating. Contrary to popular belief, raising your voice, venting out your anger does not make you feel better. It makes you feel worse. But we do not realize it, simply because of the activated hormones, which give us a feeling similar to adrenaline. So basically, we think that we are feeling better, but actually its detrimental(similar to drugs or alcohol).

Most of us like to stick to the area of our comfort zone. But going outside it, and experiencing new things(including failure), will actually lead us one step closer towards Self Actualization. So will restraint. By restraint, I mean stopping yourself from giving in to temptation. Whether it be of a particular junk food, or alcohol, or even for purchasing an expensive item which will probably of no use later. Practicing restraint is a very important tool for achieving happiness.

Of course, many people will want to know the co-relation between love and happiness. That I will leave for another post. Not that I am an expert on that issue, but as always I can provide my personal views on the same. But the picture put in this post basically says it all-'You are responsible for your own happiness.' Nobody else is going to come and make you happy. Deal with it. That does not mean you cut yourself out from everyone. It just means that you have to figure out where the problem(if any) lies.

Finally, after a while, I feel I have written a slightly better post(most of my recent posts were minor ‘About-Me-Written-In-A-Poor-Style’ sort of entries). This one, I took some time to finish. All comments are welcome. Catch you soon.

Onwards

Yesterday I turned 25. Is the number of any significance? I know not. I have been transferred to Gujarat, and it is my first time here. How am I feeling being at a new place, minus friends. Doing okay so far I guess. New people, new places, new work. Change is an indispensable part of life. If we refuse to accept it, we cannot progress. Pain and suffering shall lead to awakening and enlightenment. The more you struggle, the more shall you rise.

The desire to write has long been gone. For what is the world when you are all alone, encompassed by a solitude of sorrow? By why then should you need anyone else, when you have yourself? Why does it matter to you if the person you like is miles away? For you go to your grave isolated by everyone.

What is it that you truly desire? Why do you get out of your bed every day? Is there anything beyond normal conditioning? I dare say not.

But then you are all scared.

Mumbai Life Diaries

This Saturday was one of the better days in my life. It started off with me roaming around in Crossword for a while, figuring out which book to get for one of my bibliophile friend, who was coming to Mumbai for work purposes.

The lady at the payment counter was interested in showing me a new E-reader which was launched at the shop. Was kind of similar to Kindle. I told her that I was not much of a E-reader, and still preferred to read my books the old fashioned way. Yeah, portability and all is all fine, but I like the smell of the pages, and the feel of the book in my hand. No Reader can replace that(yet, anyways).

Oh, and yeah, my membership was still valid(I had registered over 2 years ago, and that too at Durgapur). Got a meagre 7.5% discount, but that’s still better than nothing. Speaking of discounts, Flipkart is now offering a discount of 60% on selected books, including the Luminaries(which I got at 30% discount). Get it while it lasts.

Anyways, coming back to the point, I left for Bandra in the evening. Luckily,got an AC bus which goes from Vashi to Bandra, just in the nick of time. It was empty, save for one couple getting cosy in the corner. Yeah, PDA is pretty much common and accepted in Mumbai(at least in many places). The traffic was still insane though.

I haven’t really roamed around the Bandra side much. And the station was big and over-crowded big time. I had to talk the skywalk towards Bandra east side. After meeting up with my friend(and handing over the gift and yes, got one from her too), we decided to head over to Candies for snacks munching. I settled for a Veg Burger, and a curious looking Chocolate dessert which I had never eaten before in my life(it turned out to be reasonably good). After that, we headed out to the Linking road market, as my friend wanted to check out some Shoe stores.

Post the shopping, we headed out to a CCD. I stuck with my favourite drink, Choco Frappe. She tried the Strawberry Lemonade and hated it. The place was being set up with speakers and mikes put in. Soon, we came to know that Siddharth Malhotra(Student of the Year) and Parineeti Chopra were supposed to come there for a mini interactive session. Soon enough they arrived. I have to admit that I didn’t really look at Siddharth, but Parineeti was really looking pretty(maybe even prettier than she does in the movies).

But we left before they did. Roamed around some more across the streets, did some random chit chat, had maggi, and finally I left for home. Oh, and yeah, I did see a policeman trying to round up the street peddlers with his stick, but they all returned as soon as he left. Was quite a funny scene though.
Yes, am slowly getting used to Mumbai life. The last seven months have been good. And I have to get to second gear fast.

For now, adios.

More Updates

2014 is up and running, and I am glad that I have begun doing two good things.

One is keeping a daily expense tracker in a diary, mentioning where the bucks are flying. Yeah of course, we can do it on a smartphone or on excel, but I prefer the old fashioned way.

Second is to devote 15-20 minutes(minimum) daily on free hand exercising. And yes, am planning on joining a gym later this year.
Currently watching Attack on Titan. It’s a pretty decent anime, according to me. And yes, wishing that Naruto ends fast.

Reading the biography of Narendra Modi. The book seems interesting so far.

Work is going on good and hectic. Nevertheless its fun to have friends at workplace, which makes it enjoyable at the same time.
No new crushes so far. Not that I am expecting to make a girlfriend minus any effort.

A telescope purchase is pending.

And I am finding it increasingly difficult to just sit down and write on serious topics. I will make an effort in future however.
Oh, and yes, I have (almost) given up on junk food. At least chips, chocolates, ice creams and cold drinks are definitely off the radar. And I was never a pizza/burger fan anyways. Will have to reduce the oily stuff too.

But so far so good. Now, I would really like to get rid of my laziness by stepping out of home more. And explore new stuff. Hoping to take a vacation this year, at a decent place.

One area which we cannot afford to ignore is AAP. And yes, Mr. Kejriwal happens to be the cynosure of all eyes. But somehow I feel a bit sceptical. Lets wait and watch. By the way, he had visited FMS last year(to take a session). So have seen him in person.

Rest later.

P.S.- GTA 5 is an amazing game. Period.

P.P.S.- Have been playing Naruto Ultimate Ninja Storm 3 online for some time now. And I must say, there are some outstanding players across the globe.

Of Dating, Booze and More!

The first post of the new year. So let me handle two topics which lot of people ask me: i) Boozing, and ii) Dating/Relationships

i) Why am I a teetotaller? That too, being a Sardar.

First of all, there are quite a few other Sardars/Sikhs who do not drink as well. Generalization and stereotyping does not help. Many people ask me why I do not drink. Or party. One guy even asked me this: ‘You do not smoke. You do not drink. How do you enjoy life then?’

To all of them, and anyone who is interested to know: I do not have a logical answer to this. I don’t drink simply because I don’t want to. Disappointed with the answer? Live with it. But, yes there may be a psychological reason, with me considering myself superior or a ‘good’ guy just cause I do not booze. And yes, I do feel uncomfortable when people drink around me. Can’t help it. And watching people knock themselves out/puking, fully drunk, actually makes me feel disgusted to the core.

And I do not party, because I don’t like crowds. Plus I do not drink or dance. No point just standing and staring at the people, is there?

ii) Why do I not have a girlfriend? Why don’t I date anyone?


Again, I do not know. I do NOT have any principle of not dating a girl. I am totally fine with dating or having relationships. It’s just that it hasn’t happened so far. End of story. Yes, maybe I didn’t put in any effort to woo a girl. Maybe girls don’t like to be around me. And of course, going to a bar or pub and trying to buy a girl a drink doesn’t count, when you don’t visit bars. Being from a ‘Boys Only’ school, an Engineer and an MBA from a top bschool does not help when it comes to making female friends, or girlfriends. And being someone who doesn’t like to socialize much will also provide limited opportunities for hanging out with the fairer sex.

Do I care? Maybe, maybe not. It all depends on luck. Konnichiwa 2014.